Monday, 18 May 2009
Review - A Doll's House, The Donmar Warehouse
Tuesday, 12 May 2009
Review - Alphabetical Order, Hampstead Theatre
When my beloved was not silver just foxy he was a junior reporter on The Southern Evening Echo and it was with this in mind, plus the fact that men of a certain age (his) tremble at the memory of Imogen Stubbs as short-skirted, private investigator Anna Lee in the eponymous 90's TV show, that I had booked us into this trip down newspaper memory lane.
Set in the cuttings library of a provincial daily the play shows the effect of a new ultra-efficient assistant librarian Lesley/Chloe Newsome, on the chaotic work place and the lives of the librarian Lucy/Ms Stubbs and her journalistic colleagues. She tidies the filing system, steals Ms Stubb's boyfriend, John/Jonathan Guy Lewis, and eradicates the cosy bolt hole that comforts the quietly drunken features writer Arnold/Gawn Grainger and Wally/Michael Garner's terminally married leader writer. The cast is completed by Penelope Beaumont as Nora, an amazingly patronising features editor who carries with her a whiff of Celia Imrie's Dinnerladies-HR manager Phillipa, and Ian Talbot as Geoffrey an ageing boy scout of a messenger. They're all very good which makes it more of a mystery as to why they are appearing in this incredibly dated, immensely boring, play-in-aspic production.
Christopher Luscombe's last outing as director, Enjoy, is completing it's very successful West End run. It is a brilliantly dark piece in which Alan Bennett predicts the rise of the heritage industry, Northern terrace life becomes a living museum with human exhibits. In Alphabetical Order he has directed a play that could be on view in such a museum under the title "This is How We Did It Thirty Years Ago".
Mind you the Monday night audience seemed to love it... the gasp of surprise and delight as the lights came up on the second half and we saw the results of a good tidy up on the set was equal to any "reveal" moment on a prime time make-over programme. Similarly the giddy sense of naughtiness induced by the cast flinging folders of cuttings around the office had them nearly wetting themselves with delight., though, judging by their average age, inappropriate bladder leakage might be a not infrequent companion.
Random snippets from our post theatre discussion:
following up his critique of the ashtray situation (Ms Stubbs does light up, cigarette-wise, for one brief moment) the Silver-Fox reminised about compressed air tubes that were used to transport copy from one part of the newspaper empire to another and begged me to stop buying theatre tickets when there were still re-runs of Frasier he hasn't seen yet,
I commented that the bottle green corduroy jacket being worn by Gawn Grainger was the spit of one we picked up in a vintage shop in York,
my God she's 48!
and didn't Jonathon Guy Lewis' hair cut remind one of Robert Redford's floppy fringe in All The President's Men. Now that was a great piece of writing about a newspaper office.
Sunday, 3 May 2009
Review - Nocturnal, The Gate
I was there mainly because of Jasper Carrott-look-a-like Amanda Lawrence
who has become a pet project of mine since finding her in Tim Crouch's An Oak Tree at The Soho Theatre and then loving her as scootering Beryl in Kneehigh's Brief Encounter, but the cast was also made up of Justin Salinger, who we saw in Bliss at The Royal Court, Paul Hunter (another Kneehigh regular) and Justine Mitchell (The Stone also at The Royal Court). Great company for 80 minutes, no interval. The audience wasn't without interest either as Sam West and his partner settled into the seats behind me, and I adjusted my posture to catch whatever critical pearls might come my way. So.....
Short Man, council employee/personality vacuum, meets Tall Man, book-loving/sensitive/care worker in old people's home, in a cafe revealing that not only are they neighbours but that he is aware of Tall Man's illegal status in the un-named country and that in order to guarantee his silence Tall Man must become Short Man's new best friend. Nothing sexual you understand, just chatting, playing with his model train, visiting the zoo where he loves to sit in the nocturnal animal enclosure.
Short Man's wife (you're going to love this...Short Woman)meanwhile, suffers from insommnia and has become addicted to a late night phone-in TV show in which a supposed doctor in a dodgy fez (Matthew Dunster) dispenses advice to the sleep deprived. Tall Woman, luckily married to Tall Man, translates pulp Westerns and wears a really nice pair of trousers, while being creeped out by neighbourly visits from Short Man and developing an extra-marital relationship with, unseen, Hat Man. Tall Man becomes increasingly dominated by Short Man, and Short Woman having discovered the real basis for the friendship between the two men shifts from victim to aggressor, demanding the last dance of him at her husband's birthday party, after rejecting Tall Woman's offer of joining her and Hat Man on the last stage-coach out of town.
It's about neediness and alienation and there are quite alot of hats in it. It's billed as a satire, but of what? Neighbours are hell, and Randy Newman got it right about short people? Ben Stiller's underrated 1996 film The Cable Guy has a much darker portrait of friendship and blackmail delivered chillingly by Jim Carrey, the best thing he's ever done.
On a wall there's a poster of a theatrical performance starring Karen Carpenter, which led to thoughts that reports of the death of the seventies superstar may have been greatly exaggerated.
Best moment of the piece, the blinking marmoset-type creatures in the zoo created by Matthew Walker's animation, and out of the corner of my eye the sight of Samuel West resting his head on his partner's shoulder seeming as close to sleep as Short Woman was as far.
The programme notes interestingly that Nocturnal was originally commissioned by The Royal Court, but didn't play there.
Friday, 17 April 2009
Review - Dimetos, The Donmar
Wednesday, 15 April 2009
Review - In The Loop, Screening Room, Hammersmith
To: acquisitions@bbc.co.uk
From: makingplans4nigel@blogspot.com
Subject: good f***king news
Dear Bunny,
Got a great idea to fill your empty slot, late night Beeb 2.
Saw a piece of film last night obviously pre-final edit as the running time is a ludicrous 106 mins, but with a little gentle pruning it just might work.
Main character is a government employee - a splenetic Scot with fine line in Anglo-Saxon word play, seems to be played by that nice young man who was in Local Hero and wore those marvellous wigs in The Devil's Whore. Spends alot of time screaming to very little effect at his department, and anyone else in his way "Kiss my sweaty bollocks". This is a blatantly fictitious character with no basis in reality.
Supporting roles include; an ineffectual and extremely short Northamptonshire MP, luckily played by the shortest actor in Equity the lovely Tom Hollander, might want to rethink the inclusion of shark porn but idea of watching the Discovery Channel for fear of an X-rated channel appearing on an itemised bill is frighteningly relevant.
The Head of Communications is a lovely woman, a little on the pale side, who is really only included so that the frightening Scot can shout at another gender and employ a lot of anti-female bile.
Her new assistant, Tobes, gets the only sexual action in the piece, and that's with his female counterpoint on the American side - a welcome return to Anna Chlumsky who was last seen kissing Macaulay Culkin, in My Girl.
As to the rest of the Americans, they are made up of; an enormous slab of beef called James Gandolfini, playing an anti-war General, Mimi Kennedy as somebody with bad teeth( not sure if that is a crack at the bad English teeth thing) in diplomacy, the previously mentioned young aide, and a slimy Senator who really, really wants a war. Apparently Gandolfini is really big in TV stateside, sorry I'm not that up to date with my American imports, and has obviously been included as a kind of testosterone Andie MacDowell ( see Four Weddings and a Funeral),and must have cost a fortune! But don't worry about that, 'cos here's what we do...
We ditch the whole American angle, too expensive and the whole idea of backing into a war feels dated. Keep the action at home, with more of a Yes Minister feel about it ( marvellous stuff).
Love the Scot, but too much of a good thing can be wearing and as he is a one dimensional character he won't suffer if we chop the piece into half hour eps. with possibly an hour special if it takes off.
Lose the "completely embarrassing chap in the woolly hat" story line, a mate of the directors, maybe, in need of a few quid, and we can't afford to offend Northampton in the current climate. (try and keep the MP's line re. his constituents."I'm like Simon Cowell, without the power to say:"Fuck off. You're all mental" though).
At the moment it feels like the writers, Iannucci, Armstrong and Blackwell had a fine time coming up with pages and pages of fabulous insults and then had to keep the plot going in order to get them all in, btw we won't lose any of the cinematic quality beacause there isn't any. Lets keep all those lovely words and get six eps. out of them. Title, I'll leave up to you. Fuck Off Minister?
Hope this floats your boat and see you on Sunday for brunch.
xxxxx
Tuesday, 7 April 2009
(A Really Bad) Review - The Fever, The Royal Court Theatre
Is it me?
Last night at The Royal Court one woman gave a bravura performance of a depth and nuance rarely seen in SW1. Eyes flashing and with a hint of a smile touching the corners of her expressive mouth she laughed, sighed, nodded with sympathy. For 90 heightened minutes she delivered her solo, carrying the audience with her to a climax of resounding applause. And why did she chose to display her skill thus? Because she was sitting in Row E seat 13 and Wallace Shawn the author of The Fever was sitting directly behind her in Row F seat 14.
Wallace Shawn, the voice of Rex the dinosaur in Toy Story, the Masked Avenger in Woody Allen's Radio Days,
the (inconceivable!) Count Vizzini in The Princess Bride,
and more than all that Jeremiah ...... Diane Keaton/Mary's ex-husband in Manhattan. "He was just this oversexed, brilliant kind of animal."
As the applause died away I turned round, interrupting his conversation with Dominic Cooke's very attractive partner, and congratulated Mr Shawn whom I'm sure had found me a very impressive audience member. He shook my hand and sounded just as he should.
Wednesday, 1 April 2009
Review - Madame De Sade, The Donmar at the Wyndham's Theatre
Last week, grumpy sex symbol, Gordon Brown lookalike Ken Stott stopped mid-flow in a performance of A View From The Bridge and refused to continue giving his much praised Eddie Carbone until some annoying school kids were removed from the audience. It took 15 minutes of wrangling with the accompanying teacher and the "Out, Out, Out"encouragement from some other members of the audience before the young people left and the play recommenced.
Last night at the Wyndham's as the porcelain perfect Rosamund Pike launched herself bravely into another over-written, ludicrously pretentious defence of her wifely devotion to the Marquis de Sade, the Silver-Fox had to physically restrain me from leaping to my feet and in an homage to Ken demanding the ejection from the theatre of the
six women on the stage who were ruining my evening.
And this was the sainted Dame Judi, and the afore mentioned Ms Pike, and Frances Barber, doing a wonderful Margaret Lockwood,
Deborah Findlay, who the Silver-Fox triumphantly recognised as a Cranford graduate, Jenny Galloway, a dreamy look in her eye as she recalled the good old days of Mamma Mia!, and, a new-comer to me, Fiona Button who had drawn the short straw in the wig department and seemed to be wearing a couple of Douglas Hodge's old Richard Mawbey's from La Cage Aux Folles. I know!
The play, by wacky Japanese funster Yukio Mishima, revolves around the wife and mother-in-law of the Marquis de Sade with miss whiplash, naughty little sister and disaproving prude standing around then sometimes, and this is the most action you will see on stage in the 105 tortuous minutes of the piece, sitting.. as they give great long, lurid speeches about how they feel about the Marquis' little quirks. ...over an 18 year period.
Frances Barber as the Comtesse de Saint-Fond, sporting a wig of Marge Simpson proportions, seems to reach a higher plane of sexual and spiritual fulfilment when she allows her naked body to be used as an altar/table, but she just talks about it. Rosamund Pike as the Marquis' wife spends a lovely Christmas at home nakedly suspended from a chandelier watching her "worker bee of pleasure" husband sodomise the help, but once again we are denied the pleasure of any action and she just talks about it.
I had a vision of the real story happening off-stage and all being directed with flaming brands and whips and dwarves, by Ken Russell, and wha'd you know at that point Deborah Findlay re-entered dressed as a nun! Was I the only one laughing?
Dame Judi appears with the help of a cane, though one that never caresses a bare buttock, a consequence of her spraining an ankle last week. One can only presume she was making a break for sanity and was injured when being wrestled to the ground by stage management.
Scouring the programme for a reason why the Dame lent her reputation to this painful experience, the Silver-Fox came upon this..
"Before I look at any play, I like to hear a vision for the piece. I need to be excited by other people's enthusiasm and so I start by listening to what the director has to say. When I finally read Madame de Sade, I realised I hadn't come across anything like it before."
I think we know what she's saying.
When the Marquis was finally announced to be at the door I was thinking, let it be Russell Brand! but the old bugger showed the greatest of taste in not appearing in this most unsexy piece about sex.
As the applause, and there was alot of it, died down a chap in front of us turned to his wife/companion and with a deathly finality said, "Well that's that then", and you just knew that she'd blown her chance of seeing the inside of a theatre for the rest of the year. Leaving, a woman behind us tapped me on the shoulder and said: "I noticed you were fidgeting a bit, what did you think of it?" I gave her my frank opinion, it didn't take long, she turned to her friend saying: "See it's not just me!"
Maybe there is a whole audience of people clapping like crazy each night all thinking that they were the only one to see that the Emperor had no clothes.